Change and fear

I’m going through massive life changes right now and though I see a lot of positive, I also feel confused and scared. This short excerpt from a short story describes my confusion and sense of loss.

Truth be told, I’m scared of losing myself and becoming someone else.

• 

I’m drowning.

Algae are suffocating me, pulling me into the depths of the pond.

A shimmer of light is still slightly visible, but as I descend further, the darkness overcomes me.

I try to keep my eyes open, but I’m gasping for oxygen and I’m losing consciousness.

I manage to keep on to the little sentient voice in my head.

“Fight, keep fighting.”

I thrash around, trying to free my legs, but they’re wound tighter and tighter.

The pain is incredible, my lungs are on fire.

I desperately take a breath and start coughing, letting more water into them.

I finally lose consciousness.

I’ve lost my fight.

…

I’m floating; watching myself struggle.

I want to lend a hand but know that if I go any deeper the same fate will meet me.

I’m scared, as another little part of me whittles away. I can only hope it wasn’t one of the good parts.

Yours sincerely,

Dysfunctional Girl