How NOT to Clean your Room

This one here is an easy one. One technique that many teenagers/young adults (with and before me) have mastered through years of experience and leaving things as messy as possible. Often this was out of pure spite towards their mother’s constant nagging telling them to “Clean your room! You live under my roof and I will decide what clean means!”

I will however share my own experiences because there are certain fundamental points to keeping a messy room that are easy to forget about.

Let’s start!

Tip One

Your room must always be over-capacity. You have to have too many cables for the plugs, too many clothes for the wardrobes, too many stuffed animals for your bed, too many electronic devices you don’t even need (etc.). You get the gist: too much of EVERYTHING. This will make keeping a messy room much easier for you.

Tip Two

This applies both if you live alone and do your own washing or, like me, you live with your parents and an unknown force magically washes your clothes for you, having you mysteriously find them folded and ironed on your desk. The rule is: they must pile up. NEVER put your clothes away as soon as washed, you have to go through at least four washing machines and notice that your tower of clothes is dangerously close to toppling over before you do that.

Tip Three

Fill the walls to the brim. Drawings, photos, paintings, posters, concert tickets, a map of Middle Earth… it will make your room seem overall fuller and therefore messier. If you are a collector you should apply this to all your shelves as well and fill them to showcase whatever it is that you are collecting (even better if multiple collections! I currently have manga, action figures, POP figures and Lego!).

Tip Four

Everything you use, encounter, take off or in general touch must not be placed in its proper position but abandoned on desks, chairs and the floor. Under the bed is an amazing spot for this sort of item, you may want to consider that as well.

Yours sincerely,

Dysfunctional Girl